![]() ![]() When i was a around the age of 4 or 5 my dad used to torrent kids movies for us, and had to leave the pc on for nights, then one night i snuck up to it and pressed the keyboard for the first time and was thrilled by the realization that i had a lots of buttons in front of me that had some sort of effect on the screen in front of me. I just hope she manages to be a good mother. She's in Berlin with mother and both she and the child are doing great. Now I'm here and oh, my God, I'm officially am aunt now! My sister gave birth to a daughter this morning. ![]() Sometimes parents hitting me can occur even today, but if I REALLY piss them off. They refused to even try to look for the guy and they called him a friend for years. Then I broke up with the guy I was in a relationship with and completely disappeared from the friendship circle. If I want to, I have to deprive myself of my own personality. Then he disappeared from our lives and a year after, I still cannot forget the person. There was another I couldn't dare getting close to. I got in a relationship with one of the guys, but I was just attracted. This us where I got something like a friend circle at last. Even today I struggle with that sometimes.Īfter that came university. Then, because of a part of my class choosing me as a laughing-stock N2 and another girl as the N1, I found my best friend, who I still have today. All of those interactions lasted a few years at most. In this school I was once again the outcast of the class. Last piece I ever played fully was Beethoven's Marmotte. I quit it because of it having been forced on me. And piano, which I remember having attended for quite a long while, some years, if my memory isn't fried. I also got to learn a bit of Russian before they removed it from school. I never really went outside to play with other children, so I missed that part of childhood.Īfter the second year of school I was transferred to an advanced German school, called like that because they taught German and not English there. I felt I had nowhere to be: At home, the parents' situation, at school, the bully. I have yet to see a person able to keep up with that school's tempo, no matter the age. I was predictably not keeping up with it as I could have, had it been a normal amount, so my parents decided I didn't want to study and began their methods of getting me to „study“. There was always a mountain of homework to do and as opposed to some other countries, we had to do it on a day to day basis. Just that teaching about Galaxies and all in first grade isn't the brightest idea). The first school that I attended was a private one and supposedly for „Wunderkinds“, while in reality I haven't seen a SINGLE teacher or psychologist approve of it, their argument being that children were basically drowned in work that wasn't age-appropriate(I don't mean anything bad. Even when I took Melatonine for that it didn't help at all.Ĭhildhood was where beating began. Feel like a zombie because of ongoing weirdly insufficient sleep, even though I sleep kinda more than normal. He looks at these pro players' footage in some TV show and he's like, „You've been unable to use your hobbies“, as if they have never ever screamed at me for perceived gaming and not actually cared to check), and I need to look for a „real“ job. Father, for example, tells me it's too late to do anything with a PC now(As well as how I've been unable to use the PC. There were doubts in my head before, but now it's cemented and there is no way of going back. Funny how my parents think the last few years I've been my worst when they've hurt me in those years so much that our relationship is guaranteed not working out. Not only that, but continuously limiting my time with the PC hasn't been a literal obstacle in my way of trying to do things in their opinion. We literally have video evidence of me liking the computer as a child, yet my parents either say I'm addicted or deny I've ever liked it before. I want to remember its name, but I cannot :( I have a memory of this pseudo-3D-looking game where you move in a maze and try answering questions. The first few ones we had were Tomb Raider: The Last Revelation, Tomb Raider Chronicles, American McGee's Alice(Which caused us to upgrade the PC xD). I remember having added age on websites to be allowed to sign up at times :P My sisters used to play games on it sometimes. I learned doing things like accessing the internet and sending emails, among others. ![]()
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